Now, Alabamians Can Rock After They’re Dead.

Apparently, we’ve reached a point in human civilization where your final resting place needs Bluetooth.

Liquid Death has teamed up with Spotify to create something called the “Eternal Playlist Urn.”

Yes. It’s exactly what it sounds like.

An 11-inch urn with a built-in Bluetooth speaker, so your ashes can drop beats from beyond the grave.

For $495, this white polyester resin vessel lets your loved ones prop you up on the mantle, charge you via USB-C, and stream your favorite songs.

I don’t know whether to be impressed or deeply unsettled.

You pass away.

Your family holds a beautiful service.

Then someone says, “Y’all, should we charge him?”

Next thing you know, Uncle Ricky’s leaning over the mantle going “why ain’t he pairing? Is he in Bluetooth mode?”

There is something deeply Alabama about that scene.

We tailgate harder than anyone. We turn everything into a party. Apparently now, even eternity.

I can already see it now:

Grandkids run through the house. They bump the mantle. Suddenly Grandpa starts blasting “Free Bird.”

And honestly? If you’re going to go out, that might be the most Alabama way possible.

What would your eternal playlist be?

Let me know on the thread below this Facebook post.

See you somewhere East of Midnight