Open Letter To Scott Shepherd: A Confession
Today on 'Madison and Shepherd, we revisited an incident that happened last year that involved Bryant Denny hot-dogs and lies...lots and lots of lies.
Last week when you declared that Madison and Shepherd would have a life size cut out of Nick Saban in the studio within a week, I was filled with bittersweet emotions.I was proud you were finally setting goals, but sad that your dreams would never happen.
But on Friday, it did happen.
I was genuinely happy for you when our new BFF Karen Fife pulled into the parking lot with Nick Saban riding shot gun and pointing at the world.
Soon jealousy began creeping into my heart. I didn't want you to share the shelf with Charlie Sheen and bring so much win to the table. Sooooo... I decided to one-up you by declaring to all and sundry that I would secure a case of hot dogs from Bryant Denny Stadium.
By week's end I'd forgotten about my bold proclamation until your reminder shortly before the show ended. Deep in my heart, I believe you did that on purpose so I would be a loser like the dude who gambled all of his money away at the carnival to win that large banana with dreadlocks.
I have a confession though. I lied to you.
YES, I did call the gentleman who is in charge of hot dogs at BDS, but he's also my neighbor. I sent him a quick text and asked him to help me deceive you and I may or may not have promised him tickets to concert in 'acknowledgement' of his efforts. Below is our exchange:
After the show was over and I'd won EVERYTHING, I forgot about the hot dogs until you sent me a text at lunch asking about them. I never responded. Later, Sales Manager Tammy informed me that you'd waited a very long time for them. That made me feel slightly rotten inside, but the mental image of you waiting around the office for invisible hot dogs also made me LOL.
I'm sorry. I offer no excuses but I'm confident the fact that I was able to pull this off with you none the wiser still makes me the winner.